after labor addendum

ok, it has been a minute.  one of my bffs rolled into town with her wee nugget this week.  we had a ton of fun and i got lots of  baby snuggles!  (when waiting for labor, i assure you that baby snuggles are absolutely the best medicine).  i miss them already and they’ve only been gone 5 hours.   

this week while she was here, we were talking about all of the after labor joys that i mentioned in my previous post.  there were 2 that its pretty egregious that i looked over.  here they are for your reading pleasure:

1)  bells palsy- first of all, you need to know what it is.

i had NEVER heard of anyone getting bells palsy, but you know i got it.  because j was in the NICU for 8 days, i didn’t notice anything wrong with me since i was too busy worrying about him.  (not to mention that in every picture of us as a family i was wearing a surgical mask)  after getting the baby home and bringing my anxiety level from a solid 10 to a 2, i started realizing that whenever i smiled only half my face would move.  i was straight swollen up like rosie o’donnell (on a good day) and thought perhaps my chipmunk cheeks were causing some facial anguish.  2 days after getting j home from the hospital we went for newborn pictures.  my parents were in town so they went too.  at one point during the pics my mom said to me “why are you smiling like that?” i thought i was smiling normally and brushed it off.   and then, we got the pictures back.  whoadies.  um, WTF? only the left side of my face showed any form of emotion.  as for the right side, it was completely paralyzed. 

and that is why you will only ever see pictures of me and my newborn with my head down…

i really don’t remember when it went away, but thankfully it eventually did.  throw a paralyzed face on top of a fresh 40 lbs of baby fat and you know i was feeling my best. 

2) chin hair- don’t lie.  if you have ever had a baby you know about the chin hair.  this one unfortunately is a bleed over from pregnancy.  sometimes it gets banging early on and keeps rearing its ugly hairy head for months after baby.  i had nearly resolved myself to carrying around a little belt loop tweezer set so that i can could pluck everytime a random 1/8 inch newbie popped up on my chin, when i found this:


i used this earlier in life on my unsightly upper lip hair and unibrow, but it works fabulous on chin hair too.  just fyi.  don’t be embarrassed to get some.  it’ll change your life.  it doesn’t say this on the bottle, but for me it helps to slow my hair growth.  i mean, really, i was plucking 2 times a day.  it was getting out of hand.  now, i pluck every two or three days.  its AMAZING.  i’m still convinced that estrogen is a biznitch and does cruel things to women, but at least sally hansen has my back. 

so there you have it.  these are two more of the things you should really know before your mini-home skillet pops out.  don’t say i didn’t warn you.

i’ll be back this week.  wait for it…


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Lauren
    May 05, 2011 @ 02:37:26

    I know exactly what you are talking about with the chin hair and I also got the lovely belly hair straight down the middle. How about the finger tips going numb…my baby I swear was sitting on something important cutting the circulation off to my hands. lol


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